So, as I predicted, I'm getting suspended from job. I just feel that I'm working in an agency that hires only devils. No one ever pays attention or cares about what you say or feel. I'm beyond pissed.

I really shouldn't be pissed, because I know that I did not do anything on purpose and that suspension is just management's way of throwing around their pathetic authority. That's o.k. What's not o.k. is this s**t going into my file, so if I decide to leave this hell hole, someone can easily look at that and not hire me. It totally kisses a**.

Alright, so before filing a grievance, which I think would be a complete waste of my time, I sent my supervisor an email about doing an alternative to it. She said she would research it. Ummm.... whatever. I've already done that . I already know everything there is about it and that it's actually encouraged in these situations. But I know once she mentions it to my assistant manager and manager, they'll kill it. I got to try though. I will not go down like this, because it's not how I do things when I'm being punished unjustly. I have to let them know that I brought my big guns and they're all loaded with ammunition.

Besides work, I've been suffering more from anxiety and depression, which I'm pretty sure is being caused by that. It's taking a toll on my health, eating habits, sleeping pattern, everything. I hate it, because although I control it on the surface, inside I'm just wasting away. They don't even know. I want to resign so badly, but I don't have a place to go. My resignation letter would be really nasty though, and that's not the way to end any kind of employee/employer relationship. So, I'll wait and see what happens. I really hope that someone will have the decency to not be stupid, and consider the alternative to the disciplinary ignorance.